Oh Baby

The past two weeks have been a challenge. Doctors are still unsure about the reason for my continued pain in my foot & leg. The 3 Phase Bone Scan was negative which is a good sign meaning I probably do not have RSD.  I am currently being treated for neuropathy of unknown origin according to my Hopkins Specialist. Perhaps I have a pinched nerve in my back causing the pain in my leg & foot. It’s all an enigma. Since my condition is unknown & the treatments thus far are not enabling me to be fully functional & walking without an assistive device, my husband & I decided that we should not continue in our pursuits of adoption at this time.

We had a baby girl that was free to adopt going to court on May 7. It was heart breaking for me to take our name off the list as a potential family for her. I love my three sons very much & so very grateful for the opportunity to be their mother but my heart still hurt knowing that I may not get a little girl for awhile, if ever.  I was very frustrated with my situation & irritated by the uncertainty of it all. I asked some dear friends to pray for me as I was depressed & heartbroken. God is good & through their love, prayers & support I was able to refocus on Christ & know that He is still in control & He does still have a plan for our lives. (I just don’t know what it is). All things are NOT good but He does work all things together for my good.  A few days later we were told that the little girl may be adopted by her maternal grandmother. That knowledge for me was comforting. I was reminded that God is still on the throne & that He is orchestrating all things for the good of our family & this dear baby girl.

Thank you all for your unwavering support, I am so very blessed by you.